Let me start by telling you a little story from my own life. A few years ago, I got married to the woman of my dreams. But it has not been the easy marriage that I had hoped it would be. It has been the hardest thing that I have ever done. 
The old saying is that anything that is really worth it is going to be hard. The exception to this is asking Jesus into your heart. Thankfully, God made salvation very easy.
In fact, my wife and I have been on the doorstep of getting a divorce so many times, that its just plain crazy. Now we are doing a lot better. But it took years to get here.
- We have been in debt up to our eyeballs.
- We have had a business that failed and had to file bankruptcy.
- We lost our home and 2 cars in the bankruptcy.
- We had to rent for 3 years while we waited for credit to clear up so we could buy again
In some of our discussions, we end up saying things like;
If we only had enough money to get out of debt, we would not fight anymore and be happy.
And
If only we had better jobs, we would not fight anymore and be happy.
They always seem to start with the same thing. “If Only.”
- If Only we had better jobs
- If Only we made more money
- If Only we had a better marriage
- If Only we had more friends
- If Only we had more children
- If Only we had a bigger house
- If Only we had a boat, or better cars
- If only.......
The list never ends.
I even found myself praying these things. I prayed a similar thing about our jobs, which neither of us are really happy in. I prayed that God would deliver us from our debt, so that then we would be happy and no longer fight.
After I prayed these things though, I began to feel a little uneasy.
Was I really praying about the right thing?
Have you ever wanted something so badly that you just could not stand it? Maybe it was a boat, that new car, a DVD player, a computer, etc... Then you finally got it. You were so very excited and thrilled that you finally got what you always wanted. Now life would be wonderful.
Life would now be "All that and a bag of chips".
But then after the new wore off, that thing that you wanted so much just wound up sitting in the back of the garage collecting dust. Or at best, you continued to use it, but it just didnt live up to your expectations.
So you moved on to the next biggest and better thing that would finally be IT!
I recently changed jobs. I am happy with the one that I have now. But now there are new things to fight about and be unhappy with. Things just never go smooth in our lives. At least my version of smooth.
After going through this same pattern over and over and over throughout the course of my life, I began to think. Surely this is not right?
Definition of Insanity according to Albert Einstein
Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
After much thought and prayer, I finally decided that my whole view point on this issue was wrong.
So, what is the proper way of looking at these problems?
Well, before we get to that, let’s examine the problem a little more and see if we can identify the real issue. Now satan, as dumb as he is, is really pretty good at some things. Let’s face it. He’s had a long long time to develop his strategies to deceive us.
- What if he could always get us looking for something better?
- What if he could cause us to always be unhappy with our current situation?
It’s like Luke when he first came to Yoda with aspirations of becoming a Jedi Knight. Yoda objected to him becoming a Jedi because Luke never had his mind on where he was at and what he was doing. He was always looking to the future and to what he thought would be a better life and a better situation.
Yoda was saying that Luke would be of no value as a Jedi because he was never happy with where he was at and who he was.
Even Yoda knew if Luke was not happy and content with where he was now, he would not be happy and content with where he wanted to go, which was being a Jedi. He would always be thinking things like;
- If Only I had more power
- if Only the council would send me on more assignments
- If Only I knew how to use the Dark Side
- And on and on
He would always be looking to the future and wondering what life could be like on the other side of the fence. It’s like a carrot that is dangled in front of our face. We strive and strive to grasp the Carrot. What we can’t see though is that this carrot is attached to a stick and a string that is dangled just out of reach in front of us. 
It doesn’t mater how hard we try to get the carrot. We will never be able to grasp it!
Let’s look at some more examples that might be closer to home.
Shortly after we got married, my wife mentioned how difficult marriage was. Never in her wildest imagination did she think it would be so difficult.
She said that she always had this idea in her head that marriage would be all fun and games and that we would never fight. She said that she was amazed at how much work it actually was. I asked her about this. She said that she, at least in part, got this idea of marriage from the movies. Fairy tales like Cinderella, Snow White and many others.
We grow up on these fairy tales and their fantasy of what marriage is. At the end of every one of those movies, the couples run off into the sunset and live happily ever after.
What they don’t tell you is what happened after Cinderella and her Prince Charming ran off in the sunset to get married. What they don’t tell you is how Cinderella and Prince Charming argued and fought over how much money they could spend on drinks down at their local pub.
And the knock down drag out fight that resulted.
Id like to see that included in those fairy tales!
We are spoon fed from birth that marriage should be a big bed of roses. The reality of course is that marriage is all about commitment. We have to make a commitment that we will stay with our mate, for better or worse, till death do we part.
Marriage requires a lot of work!
You are taking two individuals with unique and complex personalities and melding them together. For instance, in my marriage, I am an introvert. My wife though is an Extrovert. I love science Fiction. My wife hates it and prefers romantic comedies.
At times it seems like trying to mix oil and water, which we know does not mix at all. But all things are possible with God. God can take that oil and water, which normally does not mix, and blend them together so that in the end, you can’t tell one from the other.
A side not to this is that scientifically, Oil and Water can be mixed. It requires a lot of effort, but it can be done.
So, the reality of this process is that fights are going to happen! Arguments are going to happen!
Marriage is not a bed of Roses and definitely not a fairy tale.
In order to have a good healthy marriage, you will have to work at it. You must be happy and content with where you are at in life. If you are single, be happy in that. If you seek marriage thinking that it will make you all better and that finally you will be happy, you are being deceived.
Many of us can attest to the fact that that special person did not come along until we stopped looking. It was not until we stopped looking for that mate and made the decision that we could be happy and content with our current condition, that God decided that it was time to grant us our request.
The next lie that we are told is that if we only get more money, we will not fight anymore and be happy. Satan is always trying to get us to look for something better.
If only we had more money.
How many times have we all said that one?
How many times have we all heard that one?
Let’s take a look at this more closely. I will use my life as an example again. When I was making $5 an hour, and I was barely making ends meet. I thought to myself; if only I made more, I could get out of debt and I would be happy.
Then I got another job where I was making $8 an hour and I thought; wow! This is great, now I’ve finally arrived. But before too long, that was not enough. And then I got a job at $10 an hour, but that was still not enough. Now I’m making several dollars more than this, but that is still not enough.
See a pattern?
Satan wants to keep us always caught up in looking for that elusive Bed of Roses. If only we could get more money, we would be ok. But the kicker is that we never can reach that point when it’s enough. If you ask folks that are making $150,000 a year, if it’s enough, they will tell you; No. There is always more to get.
- A bigger house
- A better car
- A better cell phone
- Being able to give more to charity
- Etc…
Satan will always find something to tempt us with so that we will not be satisfied with what we currently have or who we currently are.
That’s why God has so much to say about the evils of money. God is not saying that money is evil, he is saying that we need to be very careful. The evil lies in the pursuit of money. The trick then is to learn to be happy and content with what you have and where you are in life.
Now how about the lie of becoming a Christian?
No, im not advocating that folks should not become Christians. The lie, or perhaps I should call it a miscommunication, is how we are being told that after you become a Christian, you will no longer have any problems. A lot of Preachers are teaching this. Most don’t do it intentionally. But that does not make it any less wrong. It’s called a sin of omission.
They are teaching and preaching that if we just come to God and get saved, that all our problems and cares will melt away.
Like being in a soaking tub filled with Calgon the rest of your life!
It’s a cute thought, but it’s just not realistic. So why are so many churches preaching this easy Christianity? There is no case in the bible where someone became a Christian and then magically all their troubles and trials went away. There is no “And they lived happily ever after” in the Scriptures.
The fact is that the bible is full of stories that are just the opposite. Folks became Christians and then the real battle started. They had to face trials, tribulations, and even death.
So why are we trying to sugar coat Christianity?
Why are we giving people false expectations? Perhaps it’s because we want them to accept Jesus so badly. But are we doing more harm than good? Sure, Folks are coming to God and getting saved. But how many are walking away at some point because they become disillusioned. Sure people that are having a hard time in life will flock to God if we tell them that life will suddenly become a Bed of Roses.
But that’s just not the truth!
It’s the same; the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Of course, we Christians know that it is better on this side of the fence. But that doesn’t mean that there are no troubles over here.
Conclusion:
If you are in debt up to your eyeballs, living from pay check to pay check and cant even see the financial light of day.
- Go to church
- Wave you hands up in the air
- Jump up and down
- And proclaim to yourself and everyone else that “You have a wonderful life, You have a wonderful God, and you have been blessed beyond measure.”
If you have lost your home and your car to repossession, and your cat ran away.
- Go to church
- Wave you hands up in the air
- Jump up and down
- And proclaim to yourself and everyone else that “You have a wonderful life, You have a wonderful God, and you have been blessed beyond measure.”
If you are single and life seems dull and depressing. You are bored to tears and want to be married with everything in you.
- Go to church
- Wave you hands up in the air
- Jump up and down
- And proclaim to yourself and everyone else that “You have a wonderful life, You have a wonderful God, and you have been blessed beyond measure.”
When you become a Christian
- Go to church
- Wave you hands up in the air
- Jump up and down
- And proclaim to yourself and everyone else that “You have a wonderful life, You have a wonderful God, and you have been blessed beyond measure.”
Get the point?
No matter your circumstance
- Go to church
- Wave you hands up in the air
- Jump up and down
- And proclaim to yourself and everyone else that “You have a wonderful life, You have a wonderful God, and you have been blessed beyond measure.”
Be content with who you are and where you are at in life. Don’t go seeking that Bed of Roses. You will never find it !
When you give up looking for it and finally become happy and content with where you are,
That’s when it will find you!
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